Monday, September 10, 2007

Problem Solution paragraph - (topic 10)

NUS can enhance the awareness of the importance of emotional intelligence (EI) by organizing workshops on controlling emotions. Most students these days are mainly only concerned about their academic work- days are spent in lecture theatres, tutorial rooms and reading rooms studying away. At the end of the semester, when the student gets an A grade he thinks he is intelligent. In fact he is, but only partially. ‘Intelligence’ has its domains like academic, emotional, and practical. So it’s sensible to realize that if you spend all your time on one, eg academics, then you will fail at the rest. In intense cases, where students can’t handle life situations maturely, would give up and try to commit suicide. Of course, that wouldn’t receive endorsement from a university. Hence, the University should take measures to remind students of EI and how it can help them perform well in academics. Workshops on anger management is a very good idea. Majority of the modern day students are always stressed and tend to get very angry when things don’t go their way. Counselors can be invited to advise students on how to control emotions, successfully interact with peers and hence become a ‘social butterfly.’ These programmes will also stress students to communicate with peers, which will lead to their better understanding of how other people think and adjust accordingly. Therefore, it’s essential that NUS takes an initiative to inculcate emotional intelligence in students.

2 comments:

Brad Blackstone said...

This paragraph has a clear, concise topic sentence. You generally support that well, but there are some language problems that hinder comprehension. For example: "In intense cases, where students can’t handle life situations maturely, would give up and try to commit suicide." What is the subject of this sentence?

Also: "Workshops on anger management is a very good idea." What's the problem in this sentence?

Despite the language issues, this is a well-organized and insightful explanation of why it would be valuable for NUS to give students opportunities to learn about EQ. Thank you!

k said...

Hi, I enjoy reading your paragraph because your paragraph provides background information(wrong approach of students) before explaining in detail the gist of your paragraph(how to enhance awareness). However, perhaps the weightage of your background information can be lesser since the question is focusing on "how to enhance" (: